Rant of the Day: Who Cares About The Hook Up Culture?

Ok... I know I have ranted on this before... but I NEED to again. I have been looking more into the research that has been done on Men within the hookup culture and have been very disappointed with the lack of interest in the male perspective. Its all about the women (or joint men and woman on college campuses). first off... I don't think its JUST a problem on college campuses.... I KNOW its not. That is just where the focus has gone.

Really, what set me off was a speech posed on feministing.com by Jessica Valenti: http://www.feministing.com/archives/013806.html

She has apparently written a book called: The Purity Myth: How America's Obsession with Virginity Is Hurting Young Women.... Which would also prolly make me upset as well...

Urg!!! even as I re-read the article to write the blog I am getting more and more fired up. I don't understand why she assumes that caring how a specific facet of our culture effects women means you are "anti-feminist". How can she just disregard the fact that sex is important enough to study, in order to see the effects of it..... on any gender. The reason women are usually the ones studied is BECAUSE of the feminists who have taken over the gender studies arena... ignoring the development of men... and then she gets mad that women are the only ones being written about?! Dang!

It infurriated me to see the one quote taken from Laura Sessions Stepp's book "Unhooked" was: Laura Sessions Stepp, who wrote Unhooked, writes that young women don't belong in bars, "that's a guy thing," and that they should consider baking cookies to impress men. (Not that there's anything wrong with baking cookies, I'm a big fan myself, but I think you see where this is going...)

Considering this was the one part of the book that I didn't fully agree with.... I'm pretty sure she didn't actually read the book if this is the overarching message she got. The book focuses on women's personal stories... not just women who dislike the hook up culture.. or those that got out of it.. or even those planning to get out of it, but women in many different levels of involvement and age. She also analyzes the effect this has on future relationships (how people desire a happy, successful marriage, but spend much of their developing years practicing with hooking up... much like training for a marathon with sprints... its utterly ridiculous.) The book is soooo good... I'm just sad that she missed so much AND that she is sending the message that the book is about turning women into baking, house-mothers. Complete bull crap.

Another thing.. Sarah and I were talking about this tonight. Why do so many men have this idea that they can be loose, selfish jerks for the first part of their lives and have a wonderful, marriage worthy woman waiting to marry them after they shape up. NEWS FLASH: the wonderful, marriage-worthy women... DONT WANT YOU! There are already quality guys for them.... They may be few and far between... but there are plenty out there. Its called having standards, ladies.

Men.. you are also NOT off the hook because you think with your genitals. If a woman is willing to drunkenly sleep with you... it is not your duty, obligation, or uncontrollable urge (dude... seriously... you CAN control it... you just choose not to)... as a man... to give in. Quite the opposite, actually.... be a man who is willing to respect a woman even if she won't respect herself.

We wonder why there are so many insecure men and women around us (its true... just look around). Unfortunately, these disrespecting men and woman can reproduce (honestly... I think everyone should be spade and neutered... until they can prove that they can be competent parents... screw personal rights... .... I'm only semi kidding).

Ok... I have to stop now, cuz its late. Hopefully I can calm down enough to sleep.


btw.... The Watchmen.... HORRIBLE MOVIE! what a waste of 2 hours and 40 min. of my life. (ok... not the WHOLE movie was a waste.. there was potential... they just squashed it... to bad).


also... if you couldn't tell... I LOVE ellipsis's! (is that the plural?.... that was spell check's idea... not mine)